Re-Feminist History (aka Bitchstory)

Guys, let’s tawk. How are you? For me, this last week has been ex-fucking-zausting! Mercury retro-shade, as the cool kids call it, has been fucking with literal lights and electrical shit in my life. I don’t have time (or the know-how) to troubleshoot an electrical panel and every single electrician I know is an ex boyfriend, or a friend’s ex husband. This Mercury retrograde lands in my 7th house of relationships, so that seems about right. Annoying AF, let me tell you. But with my darling Libra husband’s help, I got the fucking snowman lit up, along with the stupid light up reindeer that shed glitter all over hells half acre. I mean, I like the glitter part but it doesn’t alleviate the rage of assembling shit. The holidays are just a burden in my opinion. I tell people all year long that I fucking love the shit out of them. I buy fun shit all year. For that matter, I have twinkle lights and glitter all year! I don’t need this stupid holiday pressuring me! I don’t wanna bake cookies a...

Welp, here we are, Bitches. December. The last month of the calendar year. If you had some goals for this year and  didn’t get them done in the previous 11 months, I guess you’re fucked… Ha. Well first of all, time is a construct. Secondly, end of year, beginning of year, tomayto, tomahto. Every single month we get a full and new moon to set and reset our goals and intentions. So fuck the end of year blues and New Year’s Resolutions. Lame. I declare making resolutions OUT, and letting ourselves off the fucking hook IN. We don’t need to put EXTRA pressure on ourselves to constantly BE and DO and CONQUER and ACHIEVE and PLAN!  Y’all need to calm down! We aren’t even in Capricorn season yet! Ok so anyway *smoothing my apron*, December. We get to end the year with a Mercury retrograde, but I’ll talk about that next week. This week we have Venus moving into Scorpio, Neptune goes direct, and honestly, nothing massively urgent happening. Praise the planets, they got the “calm the fu...

We start the week off with that Full Moon in Gemini, which I talked about last week.  I don’t think this is going to be a soft full moon. This girl is opposite Mars and Square Pluto.  I think words might fly. Truths can be uncovered.  Things will be illuminated.  Gemini is a bit of a shit talker, so keep yourself in check. Although if something comes up and bites you in the ass, it probably isn’t something you said very recently.  This moon is for letting things go. Get rid of clutter. Get rid of shitty friends. Get rid of noise in your head (hahaha. I wish!) Simplify.  This is a time of year where we get really insane, but what we really need is  to honor the season and slow down, breathe, take our time, sleep, notice what is beautiful around us. Use this moon to de-clutter your life, your mind, your house, your work space.  Look at your list of projects and see if it needs to be narrowed.  Look at all your lists and see what needs to go. ...