"quincunxy"...1st cousin of "bajiggity" - BitchScopes for August 9-16

It’s a week of a bizarre number of quincunxes. There are 6 of these in this week’s aspects. August in general has a bunch of them. The Quincunx is awkward and requires adjustment to be resolved. That adjustment is not usually one we really like or are happy to make. It isn’t so much that anything here is painful, its just awkward and “Well shit. That’s not how I thought that was gonna go.”

There isn’t a lot of soft or light hearted energy this week, so it's best to bring the softness to the table yourself. Try not to pick fights, be aware of your insecurities, be a good listener and try to be a team player. The New Moon we just had on the 8th is already doing its work to bring in what you’ve been manifesting (The Lion’s Gate made is very potent!), and that means adjustments will need to be made to make those manifestations fit. So if you look at the awkwardness in that way, it is a bit less irritating.

Some of the scopes have some authority imbalances noted.  With these kinds of issues in this energy, your best bet is to use your intellect.  You can be soft and flexible while still reclaiming your personal authority.  It's called "Kill em with kindness" and it is a well honed skill of Virgo.  With both Mars and Venus in Virgo right now, and Mercury moving there this week, you can take advantage of that energy to your advantage. Let "them" believe they are getting their way by skillful and diplomatic (not malicious) manipulation.  

and that, y'all, is why these are called BitchScopes 

8/9 Mercury quincunx Pluto - desire to uncover hidden truths or motivations

8/9 Venus opposite Neptune - relationships can be over idealized or cause disappointment

8/10 Mercury opposite Jupiter - big ideas and plans

8/11 Venus trine Pluto - positive passion and intensity in relationships

8/11 Mercury enters virgo - attentive and focused

8/11 Mars square Lunar Nodes - a missed step, in this case an “action”

8/11 Venus quincunx Eris - insecurity and jealousy in relationships

8/13 Mars quincunx Saturn - frustrations about limitations and necessary adjustments that you resent

8/14 Venus quincunx Jupiter - opportunities to advance present themselves but you may be unable to jump on them

8/14 Sun quincunx Neptune - adjustments may be necessary to your dreams and plans but you may be feeling a little too dreamy to enact them.

8/15 Mercury square Lunar Nodes - tendency to over analyze things as they relate to your life goals

8/16 Venus enters Libra - this is “home” for Venus and she is very comfortable and charming here

8/16 Mercury quincunx Saturn - feeling out of sorts mentally, not able to connect the dots

ARIES - If you are feeling a bit disconnected from yourself, it is probably due to an interaction you had with someone that feels shady. The best way for you to navigate this is to be diplomatically tricky and use your intellect to bring things into the light. This is one of those cases where “manipulation” isn’t an evil thing. Stay on the right side of your own integrity, but don’t be ashamed to use your guile to have your own back.

TAURUS - As if often the case for you, things may not be moving as quickly or in the direction you would like. Impatience may be a bigger problem this week than normal, so you’ll need to really keep yourself in check so you don’t cut off your nose to spite your face. Look for balance in the difficult scenarios, and if that means you have to be a more cooperative partner or team mate, do what you can to do that.

GEMINI - If you are feeling disappointed or disillusioned, fear not. This is those pesky adjustments and incongruities rearing their heads. Just because you can’t see and fully grasp the path ahead of you, doesn’t mean it isn’t there. Your mind almost always moves faster than life does. Pull back, spend some time alone and really assess your desires and needs. Let go of the attachments to how things happen and try to be open to letting them happen in the right way, at the right time.

CANCER - You may have a lot of creative energy bubbling right now. The problem is your motivation is not matching your creativity. If you need to take a break, do so. Dare I say, even allow yourself to be lazy. Gasp! Make notes. Brainstorm. Refine your ideas into a plan and prioritize them. If you need to go into your shell and be a little less productive temporarily, it is OKAY!

LEO - You already know this about yourself, but sometimes your passion burns YOU the deepest. You lead with your heart, and that is your super power; but super powers are vulnerable to kryptonite, and yours is love. See those colorful flags on the field? That’s not a parade, you sweet optimist. Those are warnings. Be careful with your self.

VIRGO - All the struggle will soon pay off. You are, or will be changed by the things that have transpired in your personal life recently. But all things work together for good if you can have faith in the process. It isn’t easy to do. But soon you’ll be seeing the fruits of success. Some really good stuff is right ahead of you...believe

LIBRA - There’s a lot going on in your life right now, particularly if you have children (but this still holds true if you don’t). Their life experiences (or the experiences of your students, family, or work family) and milestones can feel a bit overwhelming at times. You thrive on order and balance, and you can feel pretty bajiggity if anything hits at chaos. Try to remember that chaos is the foundational principle of creation. Sort the chaotic pieces and try to stay organized. Dynamics and traditions and patterns are due for change, and that’s ok. Keep your head on straight, and soon life won’t feel so messy.

SCORPIO - Really good things are on the horizon for you, particularly at home and with your family or close tribe members. A period of renewed stability is coming. Your courage and strength have brought you through some hard times. Now you can focus on turning that strength inward a bit and setting up good boundaries for yourself so that you can truly enjoy the abundance that is coming.

SAGITTARIUS - You may be feeling overwhelmed and a bit exhausted by recent events or situations. It is especially important for you to realize there is help and support around you, and you need to be strong enough to ask for it when necessary. This help may be any number of things, but pay particular attention to the women around you. I also feel you will overcome this busy period of time by using your intellect and ability to recognize patterns and flow within systems. This is temporary, but take care of yourself more than usual.

CAPRICORN - There seems to be an issue with a particular entity, authority, or institution who you don’t trust or who isn’t serving its proper purpose in your life lately. Examine these roles and feel empowered and free to take action, make a statement, ask a question, etc. If you’re feeling stuck, take a look at your interactions with other people. You may be either too isolated and alone, or needing more time alone. But it is clear that things are a bit out of balance. It will clear up soon anyway, but you’d be wise to examine whatever these relationships are.

AQUARIUS - You are in a prison of your own making. You are applying rules and principles to a version of you that doesn’t exist anymore. The version of happiness that you are trying to achieve in your current life is incongruous with the person you are now. The limits and restrictions you’re sensing are the chains of the past. Shake them off and pursue a life of success based on who you are today.


PISCES - There is an imbalance of authority in your life that requires some possibly tough decisions. There is a strong possibility that you have given away a bit too much of your personal power to a team or partnership of some kind, and you can gain it back, but it may feel awkward and uncomfortable. It will be worth it

Ahoy! Lion's Gate Portal Ahead! - BitchScopes for August 2-9

This week has the potential to be pretty bajiggity. If you’re new here, “bajiggity” is a spirit word (according to me) meaning uneasy, nervous, anxious. Uranus has a strong influence all week, which can bring physical anxiety, as well as mental monkey mind. Without question the biggest day of the week is Sunday the 8th.

There is a New Moon in Leo, but it is also aspected by Uranus, AND takes place during the “Lions Gate Portal”. The Lions Gate Portal marks the rising of the star Sirius. Sirius is called our “spiritual sun”. With the rising of this star, a portal opens for manifesting and receiving information from a higher vibration. Realizations and ascensions can take place around this time.This is a period of high creativity and openness. Combined with the fact that it falls on a New Moon, all of this is enhanced.

8/8 is a very “lucky” and abundant day. All of the energy it bring is positive. However because Uranus is aspecting this moon with a square, things may feel chaotic and anxious. Sirius makes this is a very potent new moon and you can manifest changes that can be profound. But changes may come quickly. Some things you’ve worked on manifesting in the past may come to fruition suddenly, and new manifestations may arrive much faster, and that can be a little overwhelming at first. You may not even realize what’s happening right way. But when the Uranian dust settles, things will be clearer.

The month of August overall will ask us to be flexible and make many adjustments. There are 12 quincunxes this month, and that is a lot! A quincunx is an awkward aspect between 2 planets and it feels uncomfortable. That discomfort should serve as a prompt for you to make an adjustment, and then another, and another. The good news is that several planets, including the sun, are in their home signs, and this brings ease and alignment. There is a great deal of potential this month.

So welcome to August, bitches! Stay light on your feet, be open to receiving fabulous things, and hold on to the side railing!

August 2

• Sun opposite Saturn - feelings of restriction and awareness of limitations

August 3

• Venus trine Uranus - the desire for new thrills; unexpected and positive emotional experience
• Mercury square Uranus - excitement and change, nervousness

August 6

• Sun square Uranus - changes can cause anxiety and uncertainty

August 7

• Mercury quincunx Neptune - confusion and misunderstandings

August 8

• Mercury trine Eris - conversation with rejected parts of self; deep inquiry
• New Moon Leo - a strong moon for beginning creative projects, and for reclaiming your personal power. Manifesting energy is strong for this new moon, but can cause some messiness as the changes occur.
• Moon square uranus - moodiness
• Moon trine chiron - trust your gut; drawn to experiences that will provide healing
• Lions Gate Portal (rising of Sirius) - high vibration manifesting; psychic downloads

August 9

• Mercury quincunx Pluto - serious and possibly dark thoughts
• Venus opposite Neptune - heightened sensitivity, especially regarding partner; potential confusion regarding finances and love - watch for “too good to be true” opportunities

ARIES - A large chunk of this week’s action will land in your 5th house of creativity and romance. But be careful to not get too distracted, because some really good shit is coming yur way. This new moon and its influences are poised to deliver you manifestations quickly, and provide you with a sense of abundance you haven’t had in a while. The key to maintaining this and turning it from a great moment into a stable foundation is balance. Keep that in mind.

TAURUS - Your home and family will play a larger role in making you feel stable and secure as you move forward from this point. In the past, you may have felt like you needed to have stability to have a solid family. But now, the home and family actually will create the security you want. The trick is to embrace your personal definition of happy family, because if you are honest with yourself, your dream home and family probably isn’t entirely typical. March to the beat of your own drummer and your family will play the melody, to create harmony. (Oh man I want all the way with that analogy. I’m not sorry.)

GEMINI - You may feel a bit off balance lately. Perhaps a job or relationship has ended. This new moon will deliver new relationships and other opportunities pretty much to your door. Don’t hang on to the past. It is time to learn something new. It might be a new skill set, or a new way of relating with a partner, or a type of relationship you’ve never had before. Opportunities will arise to allow you to grow, and your growth will bring even more opportunities.

CANCER - I feel like I’ve said what I’m about to say to you before so I went and looked at the last few Cancer scopes...and I HAVE said this for the last few weeks! Money is highlighted for you in a really positive way. All signs point to a period of more ease and flow and overall comfort. What is required is a little bit of hustle and quite a bit of stubborn determination. I don’t think you’ll need to try to manufacture that drive...it will just happen. It may already be underway. Keep going!

LEO - This is obviously your time to shine, Leo. Lots of eyes and energy is on you, and things are going to show up for you in a magical way in the coming weeks. This doesn’t mean that there won’t be any challenges, or responsibility. Careful and strategic planning and creative manifesting will get you at least half way there. The other part of the equation is pure, unadulterated faith. Believe. Believe in your dreams as utterly possible. Open your arms and receive what the Universe is cooking up for you!

VIRGO - The bad news is there have been many changes to your life. The good news is there are better changes coming! You may find this moon and this week to be challenging to your faith and your ability to trust your intuition. You and the other earth signs have been fighting really hard to get your feet back under you and you seem to keep getting your ass kicked a little. If you were a cancer I wouldn’t tell you to do this, but you’re not so... review your personal history and your victories. Remember how hard it was, until it wasn’t so hard. Good times WILL come, and sooner than you think. You’re just soul tired, and that’s understandable. But believe anyway!!

LIBRA - Life is full of circles and cycles. The finish line is also the starting point. Death leads to life. Life ends in death and allows more life. Things that hurt will give way to things that grow and then things that give joy. This moon lands in your house of friendships. Look at your circle of people. You are worthy of love and kindness...the same love and kindness you so freely give to others. Lean on your true friends often, because they’ve also leaned on you. It’s a circle. Hugs are also circles.

SCORPIO - Lean back and take a look at how far you’ve come and what you’ve built by being determined and dedicated. This moon lands in your career house, and look what a career house you’ve built! You may feel a bit uncertain right now, but that is because you’re at a pivotal point. A new cycle of success and even wealth is on the other side of this weird energy. Be open to things looking a little different than you expected. The choice may not be one you saw coming. But all of these unexpected things will ultimately lead to good!

SAGITTARIUS - This new moon lands in your home base - the 9th house. When you aren’t sure what to believe because everything seems to have changed, believe in this one core truth: you are loved. YOU are loved. You ARE loved. You are LOVED!! What other belief could you require? Other people may have different beliefs and make different choices and maybe even do you wrong. But if you hold to that core belief, it will get you through! If something is trying to leave your life, don’t bar the door just so you can say you were right. Open the door, light up the exit sign and say “thanks for coming. I am loved. Bye”

CAPRICORN - This moon will hit your house of all things weird and intimate. The 8th house doesn’t scare you, because you know that you can do anything! Your passion and perseverance are your super hero strengths, even if others don’t always see it that way. When you meet someone who is wow’d by your stubbornness and willpower, let them all the way in, because those are your people. Intimacy comes when we feel understood. Swimming in deep water is always better with a partner.

AQUARIUS - This new moon occurs in your house of committed partnerships. It is in that house where you will feel things stirred up and manifesting. And it is also in that realm where you will find solace, healing, and peace. The people in this house (which can be marriage, committed partner, or business partners) are the ones who will help you achieve great successes in the coming weeks and beyond. If you can’t identify who might be in the 7th house for you, visualize and manifest it! As strong as you are, that is how strong you need your partners to be. Feel what that kind of support feels like, and let it show up for you.

PISCES - To truly receive, you have to take your hands off the gift you have your eye fixed on. Surrender to the process of receiving and release expectations about it. This moon shows up in your house of health, habits and routine. Focus your manifesting in the areas where you are of service to your self and to others, and trust that what arrives is right for you. If you are waiting for news about some issue regarding your daily work or your health, surrender to the excruciating wait. Ultimately, the delay will benefit you. There will be a celebration.

3.6 Roentgen Not great, Not terrible...BitchScopes for July 26 - August 1

There’s an awful lot of Mercury afoot. Mostly our ability to communicate effectively is enhanced this week. But external influences may cause a shift in how we communicate. In other words, you might get pissed off and your mouth may let them know about it. In this case, your tongue can be a pretty sharp sword. Sometimes that’s a good thing. But be careful how and with whom you express yourself.

Relationships may feel a little wonky and slightly out of sync. It will pass. Another reason to keep your words in check.

Overall it isn’t the most sunshiney, rainbows and unicorns week. It’s not awful either.

In the HBO series Chernobyl, one of the characters is measuring ionizing radiation. The following quote has made its way onto t-shirts and other merch, and aptly describes the snapshot of this week: “3.6 Roentgen Not great, Not terrible”

This week’s scopes are written with “mitigation of bullshit” and “survival of fuckery” in mind.


July 26

• Mercury trine Pallas - your words are influential.

July 27

• Mercury quincunx Jupiter - our thoughts and beliefs may be exaggerated, maybe overly optimistic about something
• Mercury enters Leo - dramatic and charismatic expression
• Mercury sextile Ceres - your compassion is easily expressed

July 28

• Jupiter Rx enters Aquarius - humanitarianism. Realistic view of self within the group
• Mars square Ceres - possibly an intense need to nurture
• Venus square North Node = you may be relying on others or external circumstances to get you to your goals and dreams.
• Mercury sextile Lilith - your more rebellious thoughts can be expressed without major repercussions

July 29

• Mars enters Virgo - exactness, focus on details
• Mars opposite Jupiter - desire to win, competitive
• Venus square Juno - disagreements about commitments with partner(s)

July 30

• Venus quincunx Saturn - bank account may be tight or stressful; love could feel meh
• Mercury sextile Vesta - work and passion projects take your attention
• Jupiter square Ceres - your ideals may butt heads with your desire to nurture something/someone
• Sun sextile North Node - your personal achievements may get a boost

July 31

• Mercury sextile North Node - you are able to come out of your shell a bit, communication with others is productive
• Ceres enters Gemini - nurturing by information
• Sun trine Juno - bonds of love are strengthened

August 1

• Mercury trine Juno - good communication with partner
• Mars square Lilith - your various internal drives may be frustrated; bajiggity need for independence
• Venus quincunx Chiron - your self worth may be floundering a bit. Old wounds come up and make you feel crappy
• Sun opposite Saturn - feeling under pressure from others
• Sun conjunct Mercury - your mental processes are energized
• Mercury opposite Saturn - serious thinking, sometimes a bit gloomy

August 2

• Venus trine Uranus - unexpected and positive emotional experiences (romance)

ARIES - Watch out for a tendency to be overly optimistic, or too trusting, You may be too focused on the details and need to back up to see the big picture. You have a lot more personal power in this situation (whatever came to mind when you read that) than you think. Like...a lot more. Don’t misuse it, but don’t give it away to anyone else either. Play your hand in a way that benefits you but doesn’t harm the other party.

TAURUS - Vulnerability is great, but it must be matched with a certain amount of strength. Don’t over give in this situation (the one you just thought about when you read that). You should feel free to tap in to your badass side and throw your hat into the ring. Let your competitive side show up to the party.

GEMINI - This could be a watery week for you. And for an air sign, too much emotional stuff can be very confusing. Your artistic and intuitive drives are in high gear, and you have the ability to solve almost anything at the moment. Stay open to the many possibilities, and try not to have expectations with too many details involved. Keep your manifesting and your communications open ended.

CANCER - You a poised to have a very productive week, with the cooperation of others on your side, but beware of having too many cooks in the kitchen. Don’t give away control of your brilliant ideas until you’re sure you have the team in place to really support you. When this gets off the ground, you will feel very satisfied and rewarded, so keep at it!

LEO - You can have stability and abundance, but it is an artform to achieve the balance. You may feel frustrated right now about the seeming lack of progress on your personal projects or desires. There is progress happening, but consider the idea that maybe you’re playing it too safe. Risk and reward are 2 halves of the same coin.

VIRGO - You’re restless, bored, and ready for some things to happen, damnit. They will. But try to keep your restless energy in check. If you don’t, you may be overly harsh with people who don’t deserve it. You have every reason to believe that a breakthrough is right around the corner. New opportunities and big progress on your path are not too far off!

LIBRA - Disappointment is really hard for you. Sometimes other people’s disappointment weighs on you just as much as your own. When things don’t go the way we want, we can get really irritated and frustrated, but in the grand scheme, the Universe does have our backs! “All things work together for good”

SCORPIO - Your healthy innate sense of paranoia works to your benefit this week. You don’t need to be paranoid, actually. But your bullshit detector will be in fine shape. Some kind of fuckery or deceit could be at play. It's nothing to be afraid of, not that you would be...ust something to be aware of this week. You won’t need to create or even respond to any drama, as you can be stealthy and prevail.

SAGITTARIUS - You may be suffering from analysis paralysis this week. You are a powerful manifester, but you may be lost in the weeds. Don’t fret about the details, let the Universe sort that out. Be clear on your goal, but don’t attach yourself to a particular person, place or thing. Focus on the feeling of having what you want, period.

CAPRICORN - Sometimes our strengths can work against us a bit...as is the case with you and your ability to withstand all kinds of bullshit. People sometimes take for granted that you will be fine, because you always are, and you rarely ask for help. However, success comes when we surround ourselves with the right people to support and help us. Look at your team and see if this is true for you. If not, make adjustments and ask for help for fucks sake!

AQUARIUS - I’m tellin’ you...victory is at hand! You may not see it at the moment, but you’re real close to your goal or dream. Don’t let your idealism get in the way...progress over perfection. Get your ducks in a row, make your plans, and attempt to be organized as if the thing you’ve been manifesting is eminent...cuz it is. Woot!

PISCES - When you start to feel the pressure this week, don’t panic. Don’t run. Don’t avoid. You don’t necessarily need to lean in and cause a bigger fuss either. Try to be neutral, flexible without bending too much, and confident. The Universe has your back on this...trust that any conflict you feel this week, will ultimately benefit you.